Friends


I told my dad about my previous post, and all the problems I’ve encountered with the phrase, “Do you mind if I…?”

His solution?  “I think you need smarter friends.”

HA.

I know I’m in the middle of studying for finals, and should therefore be thinking about much more important things.  Like contracts, or constitutional law, for example.  But this has been bugging me for awhile now, and I’m doing everything I can to avoid work.  So here we go.

I absolutely hate it when people ask, “Do you mind if I…?”  HATE.  Now I’m sure most people don’t think about this phrase as much as I do, and it most likely doesn’t bug other people.  But it really bugs me.

Okay, so when somebody says, “Do you mind if I…?” I believe the correct way to answer is with a Yes or No.  So if you do mind (and therefore don’t want the other person to do whatever they’re asking to do), you answer with a “Yes.”  But if you don’t mind (thereby allowing the other person to do whatever), you answer with a “No.”  So, “Yes, I do mind” or “No, I don’t mind.”  Get it?  Okay, here’s my problem.

Most people I’ve spoken to don’t seem to get this reasoning.  A few months ago, I invited several friends over to my house for a little get together.  Nothing too big, just pizza and chatting.  One of my friends texted me, and asked “Do you mind if I bring my boyfriend over?”  I texted back something along the lines of, “No, of course not!  Bring whoever.”  She ended up not bringing him, because she thought I didn’t want him to come.  Another example is even more recent.  My roomie texted me and asked “Do you mind if I bring a friend over to watch the game?”  I immediately texted back, “No go ahead.  I’ll be working in my room anyway.”  But she hasn’t come over yet.  Which makes me think that she also misinterpreted my response.

Okay, rant over.  Now back to studying.

I’m going to a baby shower this afternoon.  As the title of my post indicates, I’m not very happy about it.  I’ve decided that showers in general (baby/wedding/whatever) are excruciatingly boring for everyone involved except (of course) the person getting all the presents.  Does this mean I’m not very girly?  Eh, oh well.

Some things I hate about baby showers:

1. Being forced to sit around in a circle and ooh and ahh while the expecting mother opens presents.
2. Baby shower games.  Smell the diaper?  No thank you!
3. Baby shower food.  I get it, you’re having a baby.  But does everything have to be rattle shaped?
4. Forced small talk with people I don’t know.
5. Forced/awkward small talk with people I used to be friends with in high school.

So as you can see, I’m not really looking forward to this shower.  Hopefully it goes by fast!

And don’t worry folks, if I ever have a baby shower, I promise to provide lots of alcohol.  You’re welcome.

So.  Law School.  Here’s the thing, I really like law school.  I do.  Even on days like today, when it is completely kicking my ass.

I’ve started outlining, I’m working on my memo like crazy, and I’m doing everything I can to keep up with my class readings.  But you know what?  I just can’t do it all!  It’s so much!  I felt much more in control in the beginning of the semester.  I was even able to read ahead most weeks.  But now?  I feel like I’m barely keeping my head above water.

On the plus side, I have this Thursday to look forward to.  My roommate is turning 23 and we are going to Atlantic City to celebrate!  I’ve never been to Atlantic City before, so it should be a lot of fun.  Now I just have to find something to wear…

 

Weekend updates!  I went to a Halloween party Saturday night, and it was so much fun.  And here’s the thing…I went to this party ALONE.  I was originally planning on going with my roommate, but she decided against it.  I texted other people in my class but none of them wanted to go.  So I was left with the question:  should I stay or should I go?  Now I don’t know about you guys, but I rarely go anywhere by myself.  And I especially hate going to parties by myself.  But I put my big girl shoes on (and my pretty sweet Snow White costume) and went.  And you know what?  I had FUN.  I even played some drinking games with my classmates, including Never Have I Ever.  I have got to be the most innocent person in my section.  I couldn’t believe some of the things my classmates have done!  Good God.  Fortunately that game didn’t last very long.

Now we’re going into the final stretch.  I honestly can’t believe how fast this semester is going!  I still remember being in orientation, and now I’m starting to study for finals.  Crazy.  We just got our graded memo assignment (this is basically our final for legal writing), we have a legal research exam on Wednesday (but this class is pass/fail, so no worries), and now the outlining begins!  I’ve been putting off outlining but I can’t justify putting it off any longer.  It’s go time!  I really want to do well (as does every other law student), and I don’t want to end the semester thinking I could have done more to prepare.

Ready?  Set?  GO!

It’s been one week since my last post and so much has happened.  Here’s the short version:

1) Fall break – So much fun and very relaxing.  Well, for the most part.  I may go into more detail later, but for now let me just say that it was nice being home and not having to worry about law school for a few days.  I did bring a lot of work home…but I did not touch the books all weekend.  Oh well.  It was nice having the time off.

2) Legal writing memo update – Ok, remember that ungraded memo I worked on and turned in a few weeks ago?  Well I met with my professor this week.  And it wasn’t awful.  She told me that she can tell I’m a good writer (yay!), but that I needed to put more time into my memo.  Some people put thirty hours of work into this thing.  Um, maybe I’m just a huge slacker, but that seems a little crazy to me.  Now we have to revise our memo based on her comments, meet with our “lawyering teams”, and schedule a team meeting with her in a few weeks.  Things are definitely starting to pick up in this class.

3) Making friends – here’s the thing…I haven’t made tons of friends yet.  My school seems to be very cliquey.  Most people made a group of friends within the first few weeks.  It takes me a bit more time to make friends.  I’m a little atypical.  I don’t like drinking all the time, and don’t really care about going to loud bars/clubs where you can’t hear the people you went out with.  Unfortunately, that seems to be what a lot of people around here like doing.  God I feel old.  Maybe that’s why I’m getting all of those AARP emails?  *coughs*  Anyway, this week has been different.  I went out for dinner with some girls from my section and had a really good time.  Things are looking up!

4) Socratic method – I finally got called on in torts.  I knew it was coming, and thought I had it all figured out.  I thought to myself, “there are only four people ahead of me.  That means I will be called for the fifth case.”  I prepared for the case I thought I would get, including trying to think about what questions the professor would ask me.  And of course, the professor decided to focus on some cases in the notes.  Which meant I was called on for a case I didn’t fully prepare for.  I thought I did awful, but everyone I talked to thought I did a good job.  Yay!  Now I don’t need to worry about being called on in torts for a few more weeks.

5) Law school events – Tonight is a social event for the law school crowd.  The law school is sponsoring a cocktail hour for all students and faculty.  I bought myself a very pretty dress, borrowed a nice wrap from my mom (I’m not ashamed), and did my hair and makeup nicely.  In short, I feel very pretty.  I usually don’t think about being pretty (for example, today I wore a sweatshirt and minimal makeup to class – it was cold this morning and I was lazy), but there’s just something about getting all dressed up that makes me feel wonderful.

Most of the time I love Facebook.  My parents were in the military, so we moved around a lot when I was little.  I lived in five different states.  That doesn’t seem like a big deal to me, but most of my friends have lived in the same house since they were born.  Whenever we moved to a new state I always told my friends that I would keep in touch.  Yeah, that didn’t happen.  What can I say, I suck at writing letters.  But Facebook has allowed me to reconnect with childhood friends.  I love using Facebook to see what my friends (old and new) are up to.  But times like today make me wish Facebook wasn’t such a big part of my life.

I tend to accept most friend requests.  I always do a quick look through the person’s profile if I do not know the name offhand (are they friends with any of my friends?  Did we go to the same high school or college?).  If we have mutual friends and they don’t look like a total creeper I’ll usually accept the request.  This is generally not a problem.  I have over 200 friends on Facebook and I’d say that I’m really, truly friends with about a quarter of them.  Most of my other “friends” are either close acquaintances, school contacts (people who friend you right after meeting you in class, at a party, or club meeting), and of course the family members you never talk to and didn’t really want to friend but felt like you had to anyway (except my wonderful sister, of course!  love ya, sis!).  There is also a very small group of people who I can honestly say I have no idea who they are.

So here’s the problem…one of the girls in the “have no idea” group has sent me a message.  And not one of those messages people send to everybody on their friends list (Please be my neighbor!  Join my mafia!  or whatever is the current rage).  This was a very specific message sent to me.  She sent me a private message that says: “Hi Lauren!  What’s new with you?”  I know, nothing big, and certainly nothing to get worked up over.  But I can’t ignore the message.  I guess I could send a message back, just telling her what I’ve been up to since high school (which is how I think we’re supposed to know each other).  But what if she starts asking me very specific questions?  I don’t remember this girl!  I feel horrible for saying that, but it’s true.  Usually I’m the girl people end up forgetting (and that’s not me throwing a pity party, it’s the truth).  So this is completely new territory for me.

So here’s my question:  What the hell should I do?  Has this happened to anyone else?  Help!